fed up

im getting fed up of people taking advantage of my good nature, i should have my money when the money has come in not when it suits employers, i want to not be ill anymore cas all its doing is putting a divide between me and my parents even more, "u r a stupid useless boy who doesn't care about others!..." that is from a 49 year old woman, grow the fuck up all i've ever done is care about everyone, everything i've ever done was for YOU, to make YOU happy, to give YOU ammunition so you can carry on your petty fucking war against your sister, over who's raised their kids better. well hear this, I've had it, I dont care anymore, from now on its for me, im not looking forward to christmas because i have to see my cunting family, i am seriously in the right mind frame to call it quits right now, ridiculous fucking shit.

meh

I honestly have no idea where I'm going anymore and I'm sure that if i call it quits it wont matter to anyone :( emo I know but I just feel like it.
im constantly confused and i dont know what i want, i've lived the majoirty of my life trying to please the people i love and when i tell them i'd like to follow my own dream for once im told that i'll never have their approval for whatever i do.


 this is all awfully cuntish.
goodnight
xxxx

what if?

what if my illness was something worse, what if my extremely excruciating regular headaches had an actual physical cause, this scares me, like have i accomplished everything i'd be happy with have i done everything i want to do, would i be happy to leave this and say i did my best, :( im actually really scared of this, :( i dont know if i'd get it treated. i dont want to leaveanyone behind, but i dont want people to suffer watching me try and get better, fucking hard shit :( dont like this one bit :(
MILKbaby is a cunt

Early morning again???

Yes milkbaby followers yet another early morning post, I may make it officially known that I'm nocturnal, I'm watching cribs and there's this wwe dude called something Batista and he has a nice house and a healthy collection of prop edition lightsabres I want some. I just saw an advert for a new mcr song I'm not sure if I'll like it, and now Pete wentz is on cribs he should die he's a bot of a nob if I'm honest.
I slept in till 3:30 today jess' brother woke me up when he came home from school I'm sure it's not healthy to have my sleeping pattern
Pete wentz seriously sucks
I want a big house and a promising future when I'm older, I also want a bulldog puppy :)
goodnight imaginary milkbaby fan maybe I'll upload some photos of my artwork so you can actually be a fan of something I do :)
night night xxxxx

I'm not entirely sure

I'm bored. Lying in bed at 10 past 3 in the morning again gollums not here this time, I've decided I'm gunna get back down with the fitness stuff, I even did some weights today I kinda want a punch bag but I have no where to out it plus my brother would use it as a target for his ak47 or his multiple swords hmmm rather the bag than me I suppose :D
I miss my baby she makes me so happy and if anyone hurt her I'd go all primitive on them and bite their throat till they dieded, I'm so lucky to have her i've made one mistake in the relationship but I don't want to go back and change it because I've learnt from my mistake and there us no way in hell that I'd do that again
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH XXXXXXXX
goodnight imaginary person who reads my blog

sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep

having trouble sleeping right, but get this because last night when i shut my eyes i kept hearing the voice of fucking Golem.... that's right Smeagol was keeping me awake. fuck my life sideways, I'm not even making it up i miss actually being able to sleep in my own bed :(

peace and love

xxxxx

Ermmmmm hii

Hello, I'm MILKbaby, I'm 19, I play bass in a band and I do anything to spill my creative juices, I don't really know what to write on here really I'm just kinda winging it, i guess I should explain a few things first, my artwork is weird my music is pop punk/metal, I skateboard to a reasonable level and I'm currently terrified of life. I'm Ill some would say and I don't really understand how things get better despite how many people say I'm gunna get better, I want to go back to the doctors but I'm scared, I don't do doctors they just have letters in front of their names and nothing else.
I have a light though someone incredibly beautiful and caring, she makes me so damn happy it kinda outways my fears of everything else. I think it's safe to say I'd happily spend the rest of my life with her because she keeps me moderately sane... I love you...
I may as well try and sleep it's 3:01 in the morning and I don't feel tired but I know I should sleep
night night xxxxx